Well the Complex clan are now officially the straightest haired clan in "Somewhere in England"! Y is getting to that age where he likes to have his unruly mop of hair straightened (his one teenage trait so far), and so after swimming, showering and hair washing today, I set to work with the miracle of modern hair appliances and he has gone to bed with the mop duly tamed! Of course X had to get in on the action, so she is also now sleek and shiny, and my straightened coiffure completes the set.
Went out last night with Bea and Geri to a local pub in the same village as The Nun. However, whilst The Nun is on the wine bar side of things, The Dandelion is just the opposite! A typical spit and sawdust kind of place - complete with the very faint whiff of spilt beer and sweaty men, and full of tractor driving locals. That said, the people are always pretty friendly and easygoing, and last night they had a good pub band on, playing a range of songs including such wide ranging classics as 'Purple Rain', 'Chasing Cars', 'Maggie May' and 'Freebird'. There was much caterwauling, some dodgy dancing and lots of making fun of boys, so a pretty successful night.
In other news I have spent, spent, spent this weekend - and am now broke of course! But have bought some new clothes for me, some DS games for X and Y (for having reached their 100 star reward charts), paid all the bills for the month and have food in the house to last us at least a week - so may now have no money but a pretty successful spending!
Not sure what's happening with Space. We have still been emailing and last night I emailed him through MySpace with my email address, but I've heard nothing from him at all today - and I see another female friend has been added to his friend list in the last couple of days, so who knows! I'm not entirely sure about pursuing it anyway, and the problem with online interaction is that you can know too much about their other online activity - which doesnt make for trusting beginnings! I'm just going to let things lie and wait for him to respond before I contact him again, whilst continuing to see where it takes me without investing anything significant in terms of emotion and time. A most sensible plan methinks!
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Stars for the month ahead
They say 'If you kiss enough frogs, one of them is sure to turn out to be a prince.' Why stop there? Why not get fresh with the frog spawn? Tantalise the tadpoles? Cover all the bases, why don't you? You may, though, be better advised to wait until a frog turns up in your life, speaking English and gesticulating wildly. The words, 'Kiss me, it'll be worth your while,' are usually a good clue. Even so, you are not assured of success. This world is full of frogs making false promises. Now, here's a question. Why, this month, are you even interested in frogs when right now there's a very real prince (or princess) who needs to undergo no process of transformation.
Friday, September 28, 2007
Roll on the weekend
Well the rest of the week since I last posted has just flown by! With nothing of any excitement to report I am afraid!
I worked right through until 8.30pm on Wednesday night, and then a full day yesterday followed by outreach from 8-11pm, so am pretty worn out right about now and looking forward to the weekend off. In fact I'm seriously considering booking a couple of days off while the kids are at school just so I can lounge around and do absolutely nothing!!
In between working my time has been spent lurking on all your blogs (I have been reading, just not commenting), and emailing Space. He is managing to keep up with some really bantering emails (of the old me in finest form), which is both a surprise and extremely enjoyable, (it's been a long time since I've felt inspired to communicate with someone that way), and even hinted at a meet. I look forward to the banter and his pics are pretty good, though variable as pics are, but I'm not sure I'm ready to take any further steps with things right now. Will just have to wait and see!
I worked right through until 8.30pm on Wednesday night, and then a full day yesterday followed by outreach from 8-11pm, so am pretty worn out right about now and looking forward to the weekend off. In fact I'm seriously considering booking a couple of days off while the kids are at school just so I can lounge around and do absolutely nothing!!
In between working my time has been spent lurking on all your blogs (I have been reading, just not commenting), and emailing Space. He is managing to keep up with some really bantering emails (of the old me in finest form), which is both a surprise and extremely enjoyable, (it's been a long time since I've felt inspired to communicate with someone that way), and even hinted at a meet. I look forward to the banter and his pics are pretty good, though variable as pics are, but I'm not sure I'm ready to take any further steps with things right now. Will just have to wait and see!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Endings and beginnings?
In other news, my beloved summer handbag (acquired from Vegas airport for a snip of $10) has alas been consigned to the great handbag heaven in the sky. Due to an unfortunate but irrepairable seperation of one handle from bag body :-(
Gone but not forgotten...
As for new beginnings... After sending a random "friend request" to somebody (we shall call him Space) on MySpace, I have spent a very pleasant evening sending and receiving both amusing and interesting emails from what appears to be an intelligent, attractive (if pictures are to be believed), amusing and local man. So, watch this space....
Monday, September 24, 2007
Henny hen hens
A quick catch up...
Friday was spent a little less tired than the previous few days, and I managed to be up until just gone midnight. Woohoo! Started a new (fabulous book), which kept me engrossed through Friday evening and then Saturday afternoon.
Saturday morning the usual swimming pool run, complete with raging spat with X which resulted in me having to go outside for a cigarette to stop me bursting into tears in the changing rooms. Fortunately her mood improved after swimming and we headed into town for the obligatory spending of a whole British pound pocket money. The afternoon saw X at a party (Y was at his dads this weekend) from 1-3pm, which left me enough time to nip to Sainsbury's, run the bath, grab some lunch, and bath, wash and dye my hair before picking her up again. An hour or so reading for me and DVD watching for her, a visit by Bea (who fabulously lent me £20 and straightened my hair) and then X's dad came to collect her for the evening at 5.45pm, leaving me plenty of time to don clothes and make-up before heading for the dogs.
We had arranged to meet the others (all from local town) at a hometown place for the minibus to pick us up, and arrived to find that the hair straightening had all been in vain as along with the obligatory hen partys sashes, curly afro wigs had been supplied!
Off we set, all 18 of us, driving for an hour before arriving at the greyhound racing track. Needless to say, much giggling occurred, a delicious 3 course meal was eaten (we were in the VIP section), several alcoholic drinks were partaken of, various placings of wigs was undertaken, and losing/winning of money transpired. All in all it was a really good night.
See for yourself (for 24hrs anyway)...
(apologies for quality of photo's - more due to wobbliness of photographer than camera phone I must say!)
Thursday, September 20, 2007
No better
I feel like I'm doing nothing but moaning at the moment, but I'm still feeling absolutely worn out.
I had a quick flick round Blogland last night (apologies for my lack of commenting by the way, I will catch up soon) and was in bed by 10.30pm, which is practically unheard of for me. I was meant to be doing outreach tonight, but a colleague offered to do it for me, which I'm so pleased about now as it's not even 9.30pm and I'm exhausted already.
I need to have recovered by the weekend as I've a hen night on Saturday, which I'm sure will be a long one! Better get off to bed!
I had a quick flick round Blogland last night (apologies for my lack of commenting by the way, I will catch up soon) and was in bed by 10.30pm, which is practically unheard of for me. I was meant to be doing outreach tonight, but a colleague offered to do it for me, which I'm so pleased about now as it's not even 9.30pm and I'm exhausted already.
I need to have recovered by the weekend as I've a hen night on Saturday, which I'm sure will be a long one! Better get off to bed!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Shattered
Too tired to post properly, so a quick summary:
- last night, Bea visited to update on first date with Perry
- this morning, trip to orthodontist for Y to have his braces removed
- late morning, slight (accidental) flirting with another non-fanciable man (though more so) Finn
- this afternoon, hectic hectic time at work until 6pm followed by run to Sainsbury's
- this evening, dinner then awaiting X's return from friends for tea
- 7pm call to say X will be back at 8pm
- 8.30pm call to say X and friend watching film, 20mins to go
- 9pm X arrives home over-tired and full of coke
- 9.30pm X finally asleep after 20 minutes of raging tantrum exacerbated by Y
For some reason I know feel absolutely exhausted and fit for nothing but bed!
- last night, Bea visited to update on first date with Perry
- this morning, trip to orthodontist for Y to have his braces removed
- late morning, slight (accidental) flirting with another non-fanciable man (though more so) Finn
- this afternoon, hectic hectic time at work until 6pm followed by run to Sainsbury's
- this evening, dinner then awaiting X's return from friends for tea
- 7pm call to say X will be back at 8pm
- 8.30pm call to say X and friend watching film, 20mins to go
- 9pm X arrives home over-tired and full of coke
- 9.30pm X finally asleep after 20 minutes of raging tantrum exacerbated by Y
For some reason I know feel absolutely exhausted and fit for nothing but bed!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Supermum
So the weekend is already over!
Yesterday was the usual Saturday routine in the morning, X's swimming lesson (no SPM to ogle this week!), followed by the weekly visit to the library, then into town to the sweetie kiosk so X can spend an hour (it feels like) deciding what £1 pocket money can be spent on, a walk back to the car via the chip shop for chips for the kids, and off home again. The afternoon was fabulously peaceful though as X went off to daddy's at 2pm and didn't return until nearly 8.30pm, so Y and I spent the afternoon playing his new game for the Wii (mostly him) and reading (mostly me), and tackling the cleaning (both of us) so the pig sty as was would miraculously transform into a house respectable enough for someone (Lily) to visit!
Lily arrived about 8.30pm, just before X, so it was a bit like a madhouse for a couple of hours; trying to obtain and then order an indian takeaway, whilst also avoiding Lily and Y flailing arms around in a manner likely to cause injury to any innocent telephone call making individual, during a particularly intense bout of Wii Tennis, and trying to calm an over-hyped and excitable X!
Fortunately things calmed down eventually and after indian takeaway had arrived and been munched and X had gone to bed (at 10pm!) we managed to get a good few hours of gossiping in until all of a sudden it was 1am! (Y had gone to bed at 11.30pm by the way, I'm not that bad a mother!). So, an hour of reading later and off to the land of nod.
Was woken this morning to the sound of darling children's voices (read: squabbling over who was playing what on the Wii), right in the middle of a lovely, lovely dream about Robbie Williams! Not rude before you think it, just lovely chatting and being excited to be chatting. I probably woke up before the rude bit came along. Damn children!!
Amazingly for me (considering it was only 10am and a Sunday) I decided after a few minutes of trying (and failing) to recreate the Robbie dream that I might as well get up, so pottered downstairs and let the day begin with boiled eggs and soldiers. Spent much of the rest of the day washing, drying and putting away (well mine, the kids do their own) mountains of laundry (it was perfect washday weather today) in between bouts of reading on the sofa, some flapjack making with X and Y this afternoon, and then a barbecue dinner, before tidying up, hoovering (again!), bathing and bed! And now peace reigns. Aaah!
Yesterday was the usual Saturday routine in the morning, X's swimming lesson (no SPM to ogle this week!), followed by the weekly visit to the library, then into town to the sweetie kiosk so X can spend an hour (it feels like) deciding what £1 pocket money can be spent on, a walk back to the car via the chip shop for chips for the kids, and off home again. The afternoon was fabulously peaceful though as X went off to daddy's at 2pm and didn't return until nearly 8.30pm, so Y and I spent the afternoon playing his new game for the Wii (mostly him) and reading (mostly me), and tackling the cleaning (both of us) so the pig sty as was would miraculously transform into a house respectable enough for someone (Lily) to visit!
Lily arrived about 8.30pm, just before X, so it was a bit like a madhouse for a couple of hours; trying to obtain and then order an indian takeaway, whilst also avoiding Lily and Y flailing arms around in a manner likely to cause injury to any innocent telephone call making individual, during a particularly intense bout of Wii Tennis, and trying to calm an over-hyped and excitable X!
Fortunately things calmed down eventually and after indian takeaway had arrived and been munched and X had gone to bed (at 10pm!) we managed to get a good few hours of gossiping in until all of a sudden it was 1am! (Y had gone to bed at 11.30pm by the way, I'm not that bad a mother!). So, an hour of reading later and off to the land of nod.
Was woken this morning to the sound of darling children's voices (read: squabbling over who was playing what on the Wii), right in the middle of a lovely, lovely dream about Robbie Williams! Not rude before you think it, just lovely chatting and being excited to be chatting. I probably woke up before the rude bit came along. Damn children!!
Amazingly for me (considering it was only 10am and a Sunday) I decided after a few minutes of trying (and failing) to recreate the Robbie dream that I might as well get up, so pottered downstairs and let the day begin with boiled eggs and soldiers. Spent much of the rest of the day washing, drying and putting away (well mine, the kids do their own) mountains of laundry (it was perfect washday weather today) in between bouts of reading on the sofa, some flapjack making with X and Y this afternoon, and then a barbecue dinner, before tidying up, hoovering (again!), bathing and bed! And now peace reigns. Aaah!
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Stars for the week ahead
Have you any idea how important you are? On a planet where billions of seemingly similar people all jostle for position, it is easy to feel small and insignificant. Why should you matter more than any of those other grains of sand on the shore? Never mind why you should, the fact is, you do! You are made of exceptional stuff. Though you may not use them very often, you have powers that far exceed those of most ordinary mortals. Don't you dare compare yourself to others this week! Their standards are not yours. Their expectations must not become yours, either. You deserve what you now have a chance to get. A tremendous triumph!
Friday, September 14, 2007
Weird Science
Had a funny little interaction today that got me wondering.
I may have mentioned, or may not, that I sit as a Hospital Manager for the local mental health trust in my county. Basically this means that I sit as a lay person, on a panel with two other lay people, and make a decision about whether people should remain under a mental health section or not. It's voluntary work, but work that I love, mainly because I believe to wrongly deny somebody their liberty is one of the most awful things society can do to a person. Particularly a mentally unwell and vulnerable person.
Anyhoo! I had a hearing this morning, with two of the other HM's, one of whom shall be called HCO. HCO and I have sat on a couple of hearings together, and always manage to get into healthy and extended debate about the outcome! This was particularly realised a couple of weeks ago when we had a really, really difficult to decide case, and verified today at another very close call case.
Now the thing about HCO is, that he is not remotely attractive to me. Really. Not remotely. I am sure he is pretty average looking for a late 30's male, and lots of women may think that. I am not one of them. He seems a nice bloke, relatively amusing at times, clean and presentable, but very straight (as in "proper"), if you know what I mean, and really not my cup of tea - shallow girl that I am!
The strange thing is, that today, after the heated (but always pleasant) debate and the decision finalising, I found myself, ever such a little, flirting with him! What??! Seriously, I realised and went "Woah! What is that all about?"
So what is that all about? I'm sure I'm not attracted to him physically, but for some reason all afternoon (and if I'm honest even now as I'm typing this out), I've had a little smile on my face at our exchanges this morning. Weird. Pleasant!! But definitely weird!
I may have mentioned, or may not, that I sit as a Hospital Manager for the local mental health trust in my county. Basically this means that I sit as a lay person, on a panel with two other lay people, and make a decision about whether people should remain under a mental health section or not. It's voluntary work, but work that I love, mainly because I believe to wrongly deny somebody their liberty is one of the most awful things society can do to a person. Particularly a mentally unwell and vulnerable person.
Anyhoo! I had a hearing this morning, with two of the other HM's, one of whom shall be called HCO. HCO and I have sat on a couple of hearings together, and always manage to get into healthy and extended debate about the outcome! This was particularly realised a couple of weeks ago when we had a really, really difficult to decide case, and verified today at another very close call case.
Now the thing about HCO is, that he is not remotely attractive to me. Really. Not remotely. I am sure he is pretty average looking for a late 30's male, and lots of women may think that. I am not one of them. He seems a nice bloke, relatively amusing at times, clean and presentable, but very straight (as in "proper"), if you know what I mean, and really not my cup of tea - shallow girl that I am!
The strange thing is, that today, after the heated (but always pleasant) debate and the decision finalising, I found myself, ever such a little, flirting with him! What??! Seriously, I realised and went "Woah! What is that all about?"
So what is that all about? I'm sure I'm not attracted to him physically, but for some reason all afternoon (and if I'm honest even now as I'm typing this out), I've had a little smile on my face at our exchanges this morning. Weird. Pleasant!! But definitely weird!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Media Darling
Ouch! Just burnt my knee with a bloody fag. Muppet that I am!
In other news, I am currently my local area's media darling, after two rapes and an attack with gun on clients in the last two weeks. I have given 3 comments to newspapers this week, had a team member do a radio interview, and today been asked by local TV to do an interview (which I had to decline due to work appointments)! Oh the life of a celebrity!
Other than that little piece of excitement, not a bad day today, with dreaded annual fire safety training this afternoon, which turned out to be remarkably more enjoyable than expected as the bloke doing the training appeared to be warming up for the fat bloke comedy spot at his nearest working men's club! He was quite amusing though, and the session was much better than these things are usually.
And now, the delectable Pierce Brosnan is doing his thing on television, which is just the ticket to give me lovely James Bond dreams at bedtime. What more could a girl ask for...?
In other news, I am currently my local area's media darling, after two rapes and an attack with gun on clients in the last two weeks. I have given 3 comments to newspapers this week, had a team member do a radio interview, and today been asked by local TV to do an interview (which I had to decline due to work appointments)! Oh the life of a celebrity!
Other than that little piece of excitement, not a bad day today, with dreaded annual fire safety training this afternoon, which turned out to be remarkably more enjoyable than expected as the bloke doing the training appeared to be warming up for the fat bloke comedy spot at his nearest working men's club! He was quite amusing though, and the session was much better than these things are usually.
And now, the delectable Pierce Brosnan is doing his thing on television, which is just the ticket to give me lovely James Bond dreams at bedtime. What more could a girl ask for...?
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Time flies
Blimey! How is it Wednesday already? Don't know where the week has gone!
To recap on the weekend, which seems so long ago now that I can't remember all I was going to post, a simple resume -
The good - a night out with Bea, flirting with cute (but inconsequential) boy from local city, dancing in local dive to typical local dive music
The bad - getting home and missing Him, engaging in a pointless text conversation with Him (at his instigation bizarrely), not getting to sleep until 5am as a result
The strange - CBI boy and mate behaving most bizarrely after a few too many beers, bumping into lots of people I haven't seen for simply ages, spending much of the night in a working men's club
Since then, a peaceful and lazy Sunday, an average work Monday, a very busy Tuesday including work all day, governor's meeting early evening and outreach until 12am, and here we are. Wednesday already!
Today was a good day though, as I found out that we (the work team) have been shortlisted for a national award that I applied for a while back. Yay!! So we're off to some kind of local ceremony for shortlistees next week.
So there you have it. Such exciting times...
To recap on the weekend, which seems so long ago now that I can't remember all I was going to post, a simple resume -
The good - a night out with Bea, flirting with cute (but inconsequential) boy from local city, dancing in local dive to typical local dive music
The bad - getting home and missing Him, engaging in a pointless text conversation with Him (at his instigation bizarrely), not getting to sleep until 5am as a result
The strange - CBI boy and mate behaving most bizarrely after a few too many beers, bumping into lots of people I haven't seen for simply ages, spending much of the night in a working men's club
Since then, a peaceful and lazy Sunday, an average work Monday, a very busy Tuesday including work all day, governor's meeting early evening and outreach until 12am, and here we are. Wednesday already!
Today was a good day though, as I found out that we (the work team) have been shortlisted for a national award that I applied for a while back. Yay!! So we're off to some kind of local ceremony for shortlistees next week.
So there you have it. Such exciting times...
Response
sun 9 sept
2.28
Oh dear! So what did i do to deserve that?
2.37
Please don't treat me like an idiot. you know so why bother asking? And why now? I'm sure you've known for days not just come across it! You don't want me so you should be happy i'm stopping it. You get to be proved right about leaving because i didn't love you enough. Happy now?
2.56
Why the fuck would i ask if i already knew? I don't know. And what the fuck is all that for?
3.16
Why do you text me DM? honestly, why does this continue?
3.30
i love you, but you're not coming home and i can't keep hoping and wishing. it's easier to be mad at you than it is to miss you as much as i do
3.52
Why couldn't you have said that the first time and cut out all the bull shit? If that's the way it needs to be then so be it. Take care OG.
4.05
Bull shit?! nice. i can't do this by text but you should really start being honest with yourself instead of all this
4.20
stick with your canadian Number givers. Far easier texting i'm sure!
4.55
i'm sorry. you're off tripping round the world having the time of your life and i'm here. without you. loving you. missing you. and i wish it would stop. the whole thing is just wrong
5.50
I'm just doing what i know best, the thing i know i can get right. This isn't about me is it? It's about you and not coming home because you tell me to. I was far happier with "go off and do what you have to, then come home" but if this is the way you want it, then that's fine.
9.44
You should know me better than that by now, but if that's what you truly think this is about then i can't change that. Wrong though it is. I'd like to tell you to forget it but i'm still here responding! And i'm still here waiting. I don't know when that will stop but i'm scared it will. That you'll push
me away properly and forever. And soon. I don't want that.
2.28
Oh dear! So what did i do to deserve that?
2.37
Please don't treat me like an idiot. you know so why bother asking? And why now? I'm sure you've known for days not just come across it! You don't want me so you should be happy i'm stopping it. You get to be proved right about leaving because i didn't love you enough. Happy now?
2.56
Why the fuck would i ask if i already knew? I don't know. And what the fuck is all that for?
3.16
Why do you text me DM? honestly, why does this continue?
3.30
i love you, but you're not coming home and i can't keep hoping and wishing. it's easier to be mad at you than it is to miss you as much as i do
3.52
Why couldn't you have said that the first time and cut out all the bull shit? If that's the way it needs to be then so be it. Take care OG.
4.05
Bull shit?! nice. i can't do this by text but you should really start being honest with yourself instead of all this
4.20
stick with your canadian Number givers. Far easier texting i'm sure!
4.55
i'm sorry. you're off tripping round the world having the time of your life and i'm here. without you. loving you. missing you. and i wish it would stop. the whole thing is just wrong
5.50
I'm just doing what i know best, the thing i know i can get right. This isn't about me is it? It's about you and not coming home because you tell me to. I was far happier with "go off and do what you have to, then come home" but if this is the way you want it, then that's fine.
9.44
You should know me better than that by now, but if that's what you truly think this is about then i can't change that. Wrong though it is. I'd like to tell you to forget it but i'm still here responding! And i'm still here waiting. I don't know when that will stop but i'm scared it will. That you'll push
me away properly and forever. And soon. I don't want that.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Monday, September 10, 2007
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Strange
A strange weekend. Some good, some bad and some just odd, but at present I am absorbed in reading of the good old fashioned paper kind and cannot tear myself away to blog properly. Never fear though, halfway there!
Saturday, September 08, 2007
Stars for the week ahead
Years ago, there was a best selling book called, Everything Is Negotiable. It was a nice idea. You can go through life doing deals with people. Wherever there appears to be a blockage or a fixed point, you can find some way to bend the rule or free the obstacle if you look sensitively enough at the situation. Is that always true in every circumstance? Well, I'm not here to expound the philosophy. I just want to tell you that, this week, you can get involved in some very productive discussions. This may require you to put aside your pride... and your prejudice. You may have to talk to someone you'd rather not engage with. But, boy, can you get results.
Invisible (and freckled)
I somehow managed to drive to work in an invisible car this morning. Or at least that's what it felt like as I drove along the dual carriage-way only to be cut up or blatantly ignored 3 bloody times in the space of the 15 minute drive!
By some miracle I arrived at work safely, where I managed to continue the last two days experience of very productive working up until about 1pm where I just lost the will to work, so spent the latter two hours completely unproductively before finishing at 3pm to pick up X and friend from school and the obligatory McDonalds run followed by a trip to the park to enjoy the evening sunshine.
Finally packed said friend off home at just after 8pm, and had not long been in before Bea arrived fresh (though sweaty) from an evening exercise class, for a quick couple of hours of chat before I finally managed to get some peace and quiet in my own house, not to mention sate the endless blog/internet addiction.
And that's that! First week back to school/work/normality over!
There was a high point of excitement mid-afternoon when as I was checking my reflection in the toilet mirror whilst washing my hands I thought I had a new freckle. Turned out to be a chocolate smudge!
By some miracle I arrived at work safely, where I managed to continue the last two days experience of very productive working up until about 1pm where I just lost the will to work, so spent the latter two hours completely unproductively before finishing at 3pm to pick up X and friend from school and the obligatory McDonalds run followed by a trip to the park to enjoy the evening sunshine.
Finally packed said friend off home at just after 8pm, and had not long been in before Bea arrived fresh (though sweaty) from an evening exercise class, for a quick couple of hours of chat before I finally managed to get some peace and quiet in my own house, not to mention sate the endless blog/internet addiction.
And that's that! First week back to school/work/normality over!
There was a high point of excitement mid-afternoon when as I was checking my reflection in the toilet mirror whilst washing my hands I thought I had a new freckle. Turned out to be a chocolate smudge!
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Hormones
Damn those menstrual hormones!!
I was sneakily checking my bank online at work today and realised that a £5 charity DD had bounced (yes times are hard at present) as I had forgotten about it and not transferred the money in to cover it. That may be bad enough, but the bank (Natwest if you're interested) had charged me £38 on the spot for the pleasure - thus resulting in an unauthorised overdraft of £36! No notice or anything! What the fuck!!
So, I rang "customer service", somewhat irate to calmly but firmly complain about the bastardness of said bank and action, only to find about three minutes into the conversation that I was bloody crying! Jeez, the embarrassment. Fortunately, there was nobody else in my office at the time so I didn't have to a) face them, b) let them know how poor exactly I am, c) pretend everything was okay so as not to feel guilty when faced with colleagues embarrassed on my behalf!
Got the charge taken off though!
I was sneakily checking my bank online at work today and realised that a £5 charity DD had bounced (yes times are hard at present) as I had forgotten about it and not transferred the money in to cover it. That may be bad enough, but the bank (Natwest if you're interested) had charged me £38 on the spot for the pleasure - thus resulting in an unauthorised overdraft of £36! No notice or anything! What the fuck!!
So, I rang "customer service", somewhat irate to calmly but firmly complain about the bastardness of said bank and action, only to find about three minutes into the conversation that I was bloody crying! Jeez, the embarrassment. Fortunately, there was nobody else in my office at the time so I didn't have to a) face them, b) let them know how poor exactly I am, c) pretend everything was okay so as not to feel guilty when faced with colleagues embarrassed on my behalf!
Got the charge taken off though!
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Short but sweet
One early morning rise to deposit X and Y at school and one full (and very productive) day at work, and I'm knackered! I've also got that horrible, achy, draggy, bloated period due feeling, which might be a factor.
A memorable work conversation today though:
Client: Need to sort out a dentist, I bit into a biscuit the other day and the cap from one of my back teeth dropped off (opening mouth and demonstrating black, jagged toothy point)
Staff: Oooh, that looks quite sharp, is it catching on your cheek.
Client: No, but I was giving a blow job the other day and caught it on his cock. There was fucking blood everywhere.
Staff: (Wincing) Did you give him a refund?
Client: (Laughing) Like fuck did I!
I truly love my job.
A memorable work conversation today though:
Client: Need to sort out a dentist, I bit into a biscuit the other day and the cap from one of my back teeth dropped off (opening mouth and demonstrating black, jagged toothy point)
Staff: Oooh, that looks quite sharp, is it catching on your cheek.
Client: No, but I was giving a blow job the other day and caught it on his cock. There was fucking blood everywhere.
Staff: (Wincing) Did you give him a refund?
Client: (Laughing) Like fuck did I!
I truly love my job.
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Happy Ending
This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
Wake up in the morning,
Stumble on my life.
Can't get no love without sacrifice.
If anything should happen,
I guess I wish you well.
Mm A little bit of heaven,
With a little bit of hell.
This is the hardest story that I've ever told.
No hope, no love, no glory.
A happy endings gone forever more.
I feel as if I'm wasted,
And I'm wasted everyday.
This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
Two o'clock in the morning,
Something's on my mind.
Can't get no rest,
Keep walking around.
If I pretend that nothing ever went wrong,
I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on.
This is the hardest story that I've ever told.
No hope, no love, no glory.
A happy endings gone forever more.
I feel as if I'm wasted,
And I'm wasted everyday.
This is the way you left me,I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
Little bit of love...
This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like its forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
This is the way you left me.
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No happy ending.
Enough now.
The end.
Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)
Bought this album last week and am loving, loving, loving it! Cheesy, happy, pure pop at it's finest.
As for this one, both song and video just make me smile :-)
As for this one, both song and video just make me smile :-)
Monday, September 03, 2007
Deaths and Births
Well I've calmed down a bit since yesterday, though I'm still pissed off - not upset though, just mad, which is better. I know that logically he actually hasn't done anything wrong, after all we're not together and when I went out in May I knew he'd been internet dating, I just didn't expect to have the reality face me like that, and I still don't like the cocky manner he commented that to a near stranger. Exactly the reason I wasn't going to check his sites, and so I've bloody learnt now! Unfortunately, emotions don't tend to be led by logic!!
To explain the move, it wasn't a gut reaction, more that yesterday was the straw that finally pushed me to finally start anew. This blog has been sitting and waiting to be born since the end of May, as the following (unpublished) OG post may explain...
17th May
"I don't know whether I will ever get to publish this post. Although I suspect it's very likely.
I have been off work today, mainly because I had a lot of stuff I needed to process, and I needed to give myself time to do that. So I have spent much of the day driving, and thinking, and thinking, and driving.
I have just emailed DM. My final thoughts I guess - a practical solution to the situation, rather than an emotional one. I have done the emotional so many times already. I don't know whether it will be enough, but I do know that I've now done and said all I can possibly do. That helps. A little.
And now? Now, I've been planning. Planning for a future with him, but also planning for a future without. I can feel the end drawing ever nearer, as much as I don't want it to, and although when I went to San Francisco I knew it wouldn't be make or break, I have a feeling that the next time I see him (in just over a week), it will be. So I'm making plans for the worst.
It helps me be in control. It helps me to resolve.
I started writing this blog a long time ago now, or so it feels, and I wrote it for me; to help me deal with the situation, to learn about myself, to remember, and to either move things forward or end them. I also wrote it for him; to help him understand me, to say the things I needed to say, to make him remember, to either move things forward or end them. I'm glad I did, but it has become a double edged sword just lately, and is one of the things that helps continue the connection between us.
I blog, he reads, I know he reads. And so it continues.
I love that he does, but if he and I must stop, then this blog must also stop, me wanting him to read must also stop. It really is that simple. He can't continue to be a part of my life from afar, and I can't continue to be a part of his on the sidelines. It may not have seemed it for the last couple of years, but at heart I'm a main player kind of girl."
So, the time has finally come for me to start anew, hopefully with lots of adventures along the way...
To explain the move, it wasn't a gut reaction, more that yesterday was the straw that finally pushed me to finally start anew. This blog has been sitting and waiting to be born since the end of May, as the following (unpublished) OG post may explain...
17th May
"I don't know whether I will ever get to publish this post. Although I suspect it's very likely.
I have been off work today, mainly because I had a lot of stuff I needed to process, and I needed to give myself time to do that. So I have spent much of the day driving, and thinking, and thinking, and driving.
I have just emailed DM. My final thoughts I guess - a practical solution to the situation, rather than an emotional one. I have done the emotional so many times already. I don't know whether it will be enough, but I do know that I've now done and said all I can possibly do. That helps. A little.
And now? Now, I've been planning. Planning for a future with him, but also planning for a future without. I can feel the end drawing ever nearer, as much as I don't want it to, and although when I went to San Francisco I knew it wouldn't be make or break, I have a feeling that the next time I see him (in just over a week), it will be. So I'm making plans for the worst.
It helps me be in control. It helps me to resolve.
I started writing this blog a long time ago now, or so it feels, and I wrote it for me; to help me deal with the situation, to learn about myself, to remember, and to either move things forward or end them. I also wrote it for him; to help him understand me, to say the things I needed to say, to make him remember, to either move things forward or end them. I'm glad I did, but it has become a double edged sword just lately, and is one of the things that helps continue the connection between us.
I blog, he reads, I know he reads. And so it continues.
I love that he does, but if he and I must stop, then this blog must also stop, me wanting him to read must also stop. It really is that simple. He can't continue to be a part of my life from afar, and I can't continue to be a part of his on the sidelines. It may not have seemed it for the last couple of years, but at heart I'm a main player kind of girl."
So, the time has finally come for me to start anew, hopefully with lots of adventures along the way...
Fuck you, you fucking fuck!
I am absolutely, spittingly fucking furious!!
Yes, I know I have no right to be, and yes I know that it is completely my own fault, and yes I know that I am a complete fuck up. But I don't care. I am mad. Fucking mad!!
Against my better judgement, I did something I said I wouldn't do, which was to check one of the sites that twat gave me of his. And what do I read as a simple, innocuous comment to one of his online "buddies" -
Vancouver fucking rocks! If you've never been, you should go. People make a place great for me, and the Canadians are great! I would love to make the most of the three phone numbers I came home with, but alas.....!
Three fucking phone numbers??? Three!!! How fucking dare he be texting me one week how much he loves and misses me, and then off to fucking Vancouver living it up with god knows who. And what makes me most fucking angry of all, is to just drop it into some fucking comment box, that I may well read and he knows I may well read, in an almost boastful fashion. Well, fuck you!!
OG has gone, Complex Girl has arrived!!
Oh and I checked his Facebook friends too. A new addition from Vancouver!! She looks like a slut!
Yes, I know I have no right to be, and yes I know that it is completely my own fault, and yes I know that I am a complete fuck up. But I don't care. I am mad. Fucking mad!!
Against my better judgement, I did something I said I wouldn't do, which was to check one of the sites that twat gave me of his. And what do I read as a simple, innocuous comment to one of his online "buddies" -
Vancouver fucking rocks! If you've never been, you should go. People make a place great for me, and the Canadians are great! I would love to make the most of the three phone numbers I came home with, but alas.....!
Three fucking phone numbers??? Three!!! How fucking dare he be texting me one week how much he loves and misses me, and then off to fucking Vancouver living it up with god knows who. And what makes me most fucking angry of all, is to just drop it into some fucking comment box, that I may well read and he knows I may well read, in an almost boastful fashion. Well, fuck you!!
OG has gone, Complex Girl has arrived!!
Oh and I checked his Facebook friends too. A new addition from Vancouver!! She looks like a slut!
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Sugar rush
Have been to Ava's daughter's birthday party this afternoon, and eaten more sweet kebabs than is good for any one person!
Both X and Y have now gone to their dad's, to not return until tomorrow evening, and I am having a bit of down-time before I head off to Disco's tonight, for a housewarming party/barbecue to which all the other flat residents in the block have been invited. Must say I'm not very enthusiastic at the moment, but sure I will buck up once I get my arse in gear and get over there. Besides, who knows what new faces the night may bring...
Both X and Y have now gone to their dad's, to not return until tomorrow evening, and I am having a bit of down-time before I head off to Disco's tonight, for a housewarming party/barbecue to which all the other flat residents in the block have been invited. Must say I'm not very enthusiastic at the moment, but sure I will buck up once I get my arse in gear and get over there. Besides, who knows what new faces the night may bring...
Stars for the week/month ahead
Your September Forecast: Would you like the good news, or the slightly less than wonderful news? No, that's not a euphemism. I really don't have any bad news - even though I know that you are half-expecting some. I suppose, if you keep fervently anticipating a disaster of some kind, you may just create one. But I think you will need to try very hard - for your cosmic climate is generally favourable. I foresee a vast improvement in the nature of a close relationship (that's the good news) plus a sudden upheaval that forces you to think on your feet (that's the slightly less than wonderful news). But you can only emerge triumphantly from this challenge and from all you now face.
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