JB steps up. Again!

Hey OG, hi, may need a place to stay for an hour or two, if I get stuck could I call you?

(an hour later - when I see the text!)
Sorry love, only just got this. Of course. You welcome any time x

Thank you, managed to escape, at my mums now, was being chatted up! Aaargh. If I'm gonna date I'd ask you first x

Lol, you say the nicest things! Just hurry up and be ready :-) x

OG, honey, nearly there. Spent most of tonight talking about you, ha. Will be moving to (st near me) in next 10 days, dare you to come for dinner.

Really? How come you talking bout me? And who to? Oooh! House move eh? Exciting :-) Let me know when you're cooking! x

Yes, really, to (mate1) and my bud (mate2). Was sober at the time. I want a strong woman with her own views, a smile to melt hearts with, and a kiss to inspire dreams, apart from that I'm easy!

Lol, will let you know if I come across one :-) Take care hun, hopefully see you soon xx

Should have been you x

Well you never know your luck. One of these fine days JB... x

One of these fine days, just maybe. x

Later, on the wonders of FB...

His status update...
This town rips the bones from your back, it's a death trap, it's a suicide rap.
My comment...
... We've got to get out while we're young, because tramps like us, baby we were born to run... (Well drive in my case if I'm really honest!) x
Reply...
You will marry me! x
Me...
Lol, you'd be a brave man to take me on for life! x
Him...
Yeah, brave, my middle name. Think I may be fit for the task ahead, ha. x

I will certainly never understand men!

Hair today

Well have been back to the GP's today, to little avail. More blood tests, which I'm sure I only got because I was nagging! We shall see what they bring, though I won't hold my breath for any answers.

I am feeling a little less depressed about the hair situation now, which is helped by the fact that it does seem to be growing back very quickly. Thank goodness!

In other news, I am feeling the lack of male body in the bed a little more than usual these last few weeks. If only I could be bothered to get off my arse and do something about it...

Ugly

I have had an ugly day, full of being sick of my ugly body, my ugly face, my ugly hair and even an ugly soul. All of this undercurrent was already trickling away today before I went to the hairdressers and not only came out with a haircut that is not exactly what I wanted, and makes me feel even uglier, but also the knowledge that in the last 8 weeks, for some reason unknown to man or beast, a large bald patch has developed at the back of my head. Leaving me feeling uglier still, and also worried that I will end up completely bald and then might as well just give up.

Tears have been shed.

Something in the water

I have had a bit of bizarre week - with SG (Sexy Gardener) suddenly texting out of the blue on Saturday night, and then proceeding to ring me for several hours of flirting, which was nice, although I did have to reign it in a little. I'm not prepared to really encourage too much of that, even though it's quite flattering it's also a little disrespectful at the same time, and whilst I don't mind a bit of a mutual flirt there is a fine line between that and feeling like your just providing wank fodder. Then, equally as bizarrely JB suddenly got all flirty on Facebook, stating he 'hopes to see me soon, preferably naked' for all the world to see. I responded by telling him he's all talk and no action. Both quite inconsequential really, but I find it odd that both of them should pop up at the same time. I wonder who else I'll be hearing from in the near future!

I find it interesting that this kind of contact happens to me, and for the first time it made me think about the fact that there must be something inherently flattering to the male ego about me, which is a kind of contradiction to how I feel I come across sometimes; which can be pretty sarcastic and slightly demeaning to those without the same sense of humour. It's certainly interesting to have the odd epiphany - however small that epiphany may be.

Aaaaaah!

Friday is upon us. Hooray. Let the relaxing commence...

Rewind and erase

My adorable friend Disco has been visiting this evening, with much tales of gossip and pending men, despite the fact that she has recently split from her ex and is nursing a broken heart. She has an unhealthy ability and desire to move out of one thing and into another (usually completely inappropriate and destined to faii) thing at a speed of light, but I can appreciate the need to halt the eternal loop of heartache however you need to, and each to their own in choosing whatever it takes to pause what seems a never ending brain overide of relentless and unanswerable questions.

For me, any discussion of broken hearts always results in reflection on he who should not be named - unfortunately. And whilst it's all such a long time ago, and whole lengthy periods of time go by without giving him a second thought, he is still somehow embedded permanently in my past and my present; and our relationship, as a short lived proper relationship and a much, much lengthier 'post-relationship' relationship has undoubtedly and irrevocably changed the person I am.

To be honest, I prefer the person I was before, and several times just lately I have found myself thinking about him and wishing I could just delete the whole thing. Literally, rewind and erase.